Only Hope

This song hit me hard when I really stopped to listen to the lyrics. He was my first love and the only one I had ever been with. I gave him all of myself and I did it gladly and willingly. I thought I would be his light and hope and in turn he would be mine.

When I first married I prayed every night over and over to let him love me, let us be happy, let us be together forever. As time progressed I prayed for him to want me to desire me, to show me physically that he loved me.

I felt like I kept praying to a God that was not listening and I felt like my ex did not see the pain he put me through. To feel so deeply, to hurt so profoundly and him to go along as if it did not matter. It breaks you in a way that you are unsure you will ever recover from.

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