William Blake

You never know what is enough unless you know what is more than enough.

Paul & Paulina

I have been perusing FunFactory toys for years, but had yet to purchase one. When my marriage came to an end, I knew it was time to treat myself to a toy all my own.

Excited I spent hours looking for what I wanted carefully weighing my options and finally selected Paul & Paulina. (A concept similar to "The Rabbit".) I loved the design of Paul & Paulina, it looked whimsical and fun. I quickly pressed the submit button and watched as my order floated off into the great abyss of the net to be processed.

The wait seemed unbearable. On pins and needles I tracked its movements. When it left the warehouse in Germany, to when it made a stop in Philadelphia and finally here to the UPS warehouse. I couldn't risk it being delivered to the house and me not being there to sign for it so I had it routed to my work.

October 13, 2009 a little after 5:30, the office door opened. I don't think I have ever been so happy to see the UPS guy as I was this day. I signed the packing slip and gave him what can only be considered a goofy telling grin and bid him good day.

The minute he was out the door, I closed the blinds and locked the front door. I tore in to that box like a child on Christmas morning! I felt like when I pulled my new toy from the brown nondescript packing box there should have been celestial music playing. It looked so beautiful. I couldn't wait to get home so I could try it out.

Lovingly I packed it back into the brown box and carried it out to my car. I drove the short distance home and snuck it upstairs to my bedroom. I knew I would have to wait until the house was quiet and the kids were in bed. All during dinner it was hard to contain my excitement but eight o'clock finally came and the kids were bathed and in bed.

Fun Factory had included several packets of their brand of lubricant to try and I was smart enough to purchase batteries ahead of time. I stripped out of my clothing and slipped between my sheets, eager to enjoy my new toy. I directed my brain to clear out the stress and thoughts so I could allow my very over active imagination to work. My mind flooded with erotic images flashing quickly from one image to the next like a flicker show.

The controls were easy to reach while the toy was in position. There are two different controls. One for Paul, which is the part of the toy that is placed inside the vagina; it performs the spinning and rotating. The second control powers Paulina, the clitoral stimulator.

My body slowly started tensing in all the right places. My toes flexing and curling as the build got more intense. As the waves of pleasure washed over me, I easily reached down and turned the controls off.

It was fairly quiet which I find to be an important aspect of a toy. While I love the design and how playful and fun it looks, I was not impressed with its speed or power. I had to adjust the toy several times which was frustrating and caused me to have to rebuild some of the intensity to get to my desired goal.

The place where the batteries (the grey part at the bottom) go is made of a very light weight plastic. The benefit of this is that it keeps the toy from being heavy, making it easy to maneuver, however it feels cheap and the battery cover slips off much too easily.

I was expecting Paul & Paulina to be similar or have even more power then my vibrator. In all fairness, I do believe this toy would be more fun to use with a partner, although the intent is for solo action.

Perhaps, I have gotten to use to my vibrator and I may not have given it a fair chance, so I shall think about pulling it out of the drawer to give it another go!

While I was not happy with the performance of this toy I am still willing to try a few other FunFactory toys. They are the ultimate blend of goofy fun, modern design, and high eroticism.

Side Note: My reviews are simply my view. I am not tied to any manufactures, so my opinions are solely how I feel about the toy I am reviewing. Hope you find the review helpful, one way or another.


7.5 inches long
1.25 to 1.75 inches wide
100% Pure Silicone

Manufactured in Germany, Fun Factory vibrators are fast becoming known as the BMW of sex toys. They are beautifully designed with their whimsical shapes and colors, bringing a playfulness to the sex toy industry.

A Chemical Reaction

Thinking I was being bold and in control, I was audacious in my idiocy. Desperately wanting to believe there was some ounce of control I had in the chaos my life had become, I chose you to be my Paramour. Make no mistake it was my choice.

My pursuit of you was never timid. My persuasion quite easy. You wanted me as much as I wanted you. I planned to have you and have you I did. It was for far briefer of a time then I wished and you were not the lover I had hoped you would be, but in those brief hours being with you was a gift I shall not soon forget.

Your eyes so enigmatic they can pierce me even through a memory. I can close my eyes and your image is burnt to the inside of my eye lids. All the feelings come rushing back like flood waters spilling over a levy. The lust I felt for you was real and the chemistry between us a chemical reaction waiting to explode into a glorious disaster.

Standing near you made my pulse race. The mere smell of you was intoxicating, easily bringing me to my knees. Neurons firing off messages in my brain telling my body that I needed your touch. I needed to feel the gentle pressure of your lips. Your tongue dancing with mine. Your kisses were the best I have ever had.

A growing necessity to feel that kiss turn from a light touch to an aggressive need. Your fingers nimbly undoing the teal sash at my side so you could slip your hands around my waist. Finding our way across the room and up against the wall. Feeling you lift my legs up to meet you. A hunger between both of us that must be fulfilled.

You seemed so perfect in theory; a play thing, a toy at my disposal to make me feel better, after all that was the role of a Paramour. In my attempt to assure you I would not be hurt by this arrangement that this is what I wanted, I inadvertently gave you permission to disrespect me. You would blow me off and dismiss me as if I did not matter because in fact I did not matter.

I must tell you I am sad to see it's end but from this; a growth, a learning experience I have gained. Oh... how I miss your kiss and your touch.

Secrets Of This Blue Eyed Minx

*I laugh loudly and usually at the wrong moments.*I find it absolutely hilarious when people hurt themselves, especially when they are being stupid.*I talk to much.*I never seem to say the right things, they always come out all wrong.*I over explain and preface conversations when it is often not warranted.*I am honest to a fault, so don't ask me a question unless you are truly ready to hear the answer no matter what the answer may be.*I can not go one day with out playing with my hair, twirling it around my fingers like a small child.*I am truly terrified of the dentist, not in a small way but full blown odontophobia.*You may see me cry if you go to the dentist office with me.*I really only go to set a good example for my children.*Matchbox Twenty has been and will always be my favorite band!* I love Cherry Garcia Ice Cream.* Reeses's and Rolos are two of my favorite chocolate choices.* Back up chocolate would be Snickers and Baby Ruth.*My favorite dessert is cheesecake.*I am not above driving up to two hours away to get good cheesecake.*I usually only paint my toes a color in the winter when no one will see them but me.*In the summer I do the french because I think it looks more sophisticated.*My favorite color is navy blue or almost any shade of blue, however if I were to buy a new car it would be red.*My last two cars have been some shade of red.*My dream car constantly changes.*It is a drastic change from a Mini Cooper or a VW Bug to a huge SUV.*I would rather take a slap to the face or a gut punch then have someone see me cry.*I hate feeling weak and I don't ask for help easily.*I have a wicked unwavering sexual proclivity towards stripes.*Please don't ask me to explain the appeal because I have NO idea.*Favorite sexual position: All of them, but if I have to choose I would say doggie style.*I like spanking, anal, tying up, sexting, and dirty talk is fantastic if the other person knows how to do it.*I like to eat Lucky Charms after sex, though I must confess I have not done this in awhile.*My sex drawer is full of toys but I also keep Altoids for his pleasure and Haribo gummy bears for me.*I suck on the gummy bears to keep my mouth from getting dry, because I take lots of deep breaths causing the orgasm to be more intense.*I have a growing desire to dress in leather and be a dominatrix goddess to someone.*The one part of my body I hate would be my stomach.*Body part I think looks the best; breasts hands down!*You would never guess it looking at me but I love Science Fiction.*Some of my favorites; Fringe, Eureka, Warehouse 13, old ones: Sea Quest, Quantum Leap, Sliders, and numerous others.*

For those of you who know me best feel free to add to my list via comment section.

D.H. Lawrence

Love is the flower of life, and blossoms unexpectedly and without law, and must be plucked where it is found, and enjoyed for the brief hour of its duration.

Kissing Facts

*The science of kissing is called philematology.

*A real kiss quickens your pulse to 100 beats in a minute

*50% of all people kiss before they turn 14. (I am not in that 50%. I didn't get my first kiss until I was 19.)

*An average woman kisses about 79 men before getting married. (I only kissed 1 person and my husband, so 2 people total until recently ;)

*Kissing is a physical expression of deep affection or love between two people, in which the sensations of touch, taste, and smell are involved. (Or in can be about some good ole fashion lust!)

*French kissing involves all 34 muscles in the face, a pucker kiss involves only two.

*The most important muscle in kissing is the orbicularis oris, also known as the kissing muscle, which allows the lips to “pucker.”

*Lips are 100 times more sensitive than the tips of the fingers. Not even genitals have as much sensitivity as lips.

*It is estimated that the average person will spend about 20,160 minutes kissing in their lifetime.

*Passionate kissing burns 6.4 calories a minute. A Hershey’s kiss contains 26 calories, which takes five minutes of walking–or about four minutes of kissing–to burn off.

*Women's lips take on a rosey-red hue after preforming oral stimulation due to the rush of blood to the lips and friction. (Wonder if Revlon makes that color?)

*Our brains have special neurons that help us locate each others lips in the dark. (In the dark, in the day light, by candle light or moon light, just please please please be good.)

Statements in italics are my thoughts.
Information and facts are complied from various websites and research.

The Complicit Contract

I can lie to my friends and I can lie to my family and I can lie to those during my lunch break. I can put on a good show for those in the supermarket or my children or pretend really well when asked.

I can go about the mechanical replications and repetitions that mark my normal routine and to the outside observer I seem calm, collected, together, if not happy at the very least not miserable.

I can rearrange paintings, buy new candles, paint a wall and move everything to make it seem like he was never here. I can put one foot in front of the other, go to work, and contribute to society.

I can keep what's eating me alive concealed from the world because that is the complicit contract, isn’t it? Everyone has their own problems to worry about. Someone can always top mine, so hey, who am I to add to the collective angst?

My question is: When does it stop being so hard? So gut wrenching awful? When can putting one foot in front of the other become an easy task again. That smiling and responding, "I am good" becomes the truth again?

Only Hope

This song hit me hard when I really stopped to listen to the lyrics. He was my first love and the only one I had ever been with. I gave him all of myself and I did it gladly and willingly. I thought I would be his light and hope and in turn he would be mine.

When I first married I prayed every night over and over to let him love me, let us be happy, let us be together forever. As time progressed I prayed for him to want me to desire me, to show me physically that he loved me.

I felt like I kept praying to a God that was not listening and I felt like my ex did not see the pain he put me through. To feel so deeply, to hurt so profoundly and him to go along as if it did not matter. It breaks you in a way that you are unsure you will ever recover from.